Me: You know mom sometimes takes a long time to get ready and then rushes down to meet us in the lobby, then gets irritated if we're not pitch-perfect on time.
Sis: Yeah but she has a funny sense of time. When she's out and about and coming to meet you somewhere, she always somehow gets there on time. No watch or anything.
(Later...)
Me: Our brunch reservation is for 2:00.
Mom: Can it be earlier?
Me: Sorry--2:00 was the earliest they had.
Mom: Oh. ... ... ...how about 12:30?
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My name is Roger.